A Familiar Stranger
by misajingles
Summary: Emma is alive after all, thanks to secrets she kept from Mutant X. Will eventually include the other members of Mutant X as well.
1. Blood & Coffee

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.

A single red drop fell unnoticed. The young blonde woman watched as the thick liquid came in contact with the tile countertop in front of her. There had been a time, and in reality that time wasn't really that long ago, when she would have gone to any lengths to keep a situation like this under wraps. The truth is that now, things like this were so common, she sometimes failed to realized that the blood leaking out of her nose was actually her own. She used to panic. The crimson used to scare her, and if it scared her, there was no telling how those around her would react. But where she was now, none of these people mattered. There were few who ever did matter to her, and those that had, didn't... at least not anymore. Her blue eyes never left the warm liquid in front of her, but slowly she brought her right hand up to meet the oncoming stream of red as it seeped out of her nose. She never even had to lookup to know that the elder waitress had now stepped in front of her. Emma knew the woman was about to ask her a question. She even knew what question. She always knew what question.

"Coffee?" the grey haired woman asked as she held up the half empty glass decanter.

Emma gently nodded her head, her left hand slowly reached out and took a small handful of napkins from the metal container that matched all the metal décor in the retro dinner. Without a smile, the woman filled her cup with a thin liquid made from recycled grounds, and quickly walked away. That is why she always liked it here. Everybody, even the workers, were in some sort of transit. Just tourists. On their way through to move on to more important things. Except for her. She found her ever moving backdrops and surroundings to be comforting in a way that only she could.

With her unintentional mess now cleaned up, Emma set out to finish off her last cup of coffee. She didn't exactly blend in. But then she never really needed to. The door was behind her, and in the busy dinner it was always in a state of moving. But she never turned around; she had no need to be nervous anymore. She knew everything about everybody, without knowing anything about anyone of them. That was her gift. She knew the who, what, where, when, why and how about everybody, without ever wanting to. She knew their life story before they even contemplated stepping foot inside the door. She knew their intentions and what actions would stem from them. So by keeping that one part of her always on alert she could allow all her other parts their much needed rest. And their coffee.

Sitting the now empty porcelain cup down on the counter, she slowly stood up and scooted the red stool back. Reaching into her jeans pockets she pulled out a twenty dollar bill and slapped it down onto the counter. As a friendly gesture, to someone whose name she didn't care to know, she flashed her waitress another smile before she turned and strode out through the metal doors.

No one had noticed her presence, and therefore no one really noticed her retreat. Not even the waitress, and it wasn't because Emma Delauro blended in. It was because she made them think she did. No one ever made eye contact with her, even though she could look directly into their souls with a single glance. That's how she managed from day to day. At this point in her life she was an expert at barriers. Whether these barriers were real or only in her mind, she could use them to control just about everything that she came in contact with. She could see and sense everyone, but she could also filter out whom she let see or sense her and whom she didn't. Or as chance would have it, she could control individual parts of her she let them see. This allowed for convenient cover-ups of things such as spontaneous bleeding in retro dinners. There was no more worrying. There was no more looking behind her, she now knew what was behind her... in front of her... and everywhere around her. Even if somehow a threat found its way to her she could just fend it off without a second though. This was the single comfort that her powers gave her, but the negative aspects of her mutation far outweighed this one positive. And these negative aspects where always apparent and they seemed to only come in large quantities, so her patented barriers were always up. If these barriers were to ever falter... she knew she would fall. She knew she was _going_ to fall. For good. And that time was coming quickly. The nosebleeds were a constant reminder of this fact.

Even if someone who knew her from her past adventures saw her now, they wouldn't recognize her as the same scared junior member of Mutant X. She wasn't even the slightest bit afraid anymore. She could use her powers to her full ability, but she was never cocky. There was always too much going on in her brain to have time to become conceded, so she somehow managed to walk tall without looking arrogant. The lanky girl had let her hair grow back to its natural dirty blond hue, and she now let her locks fly free around her face. Her bangs she had allowed to grow out, Adam had guessed that she would look younger this way, and he had been right. She used to have her hair like this as a child. Maybe that's why she liked it so much, since it reminded her of a simpler time.

After two blocks she turned a quick right and entered a downtown alley. This was her favorite part of town. The back. The entire history of a building was there in front of her, it was laid out on the stones that made up its rear. Often neglected and uncared for, Emma always felt that if she paid enough attention she could see time move in the bricks that made up the structures skeleton. She couldn't help but smile. She enjoyed where she was. Well... physically anyways. After climbing up a small cement stair case. Emma reached into her pockets and retrieved her keys. A few seconds later, the door to her apartment opened and she was home.

It had been quite a transition from the large open area of Sanctuary, to move into this small studio apartment. The ad had actually called it an efficiency. Basically all that meant is that it was all one big room. Even the toilet would have been visible if it wasn't for a well placed curtain. It was small, almost tiny, but Emma loved it. She even loved the constant hum of the jukebox that never stopped playing in Norman's, the bar that was located directly below. The two big windows that overlooked the street, were Emma's favorite attributes. She could sit there forever and watch the people of Manhattan stroll by.

Emma pulled off her tan leather jacket, to reveal a dark red tank top underneath. She slipped off her sandals and walked over to a small cabinet in which she found a small bottle of Advil. She quickly poured herself a glass of water and took six of the small orangish colored pills. She had stayed out in public too long, and already her head was beginning to pay for her mistake. She quickly pulled the curtains closed on Manhattan and turned off all the lights, as she made her way over to the tub. Soon her jeans were off and she stepped one foot after the other into the white basin. She sat down at first and then finally leaned back into the soft pillow, and pulled the blankets up around her. Adam would be here soon, she knew that, even though she wasn't quite sure what day it was. She knew he always came on Tuesdays. She actually tried to not keep track of the time that passed. She was afraid that if she looked forward to his visits that she might end up missing him, and then she would, without thinking, let the loneliness in. And she was more afraid of that than anything.


	2. Replacement?

AUTHORS NOTE: thanks to everyone who reviewed, I'm glad you liked it. This is my first fanfiction, and one that has been coming a long time. Below is an explanation of what is brought into this fic. Feel free to skip it but it might make more sense if you do read it. Thanks Again.

I quit watching Mutant X after the second season, I think I watched the first episode of season three but for some reason found it less interesting without Emma. So this is written with hardly no knowledge of what has happened since that episode. I will however include the knowledge I obtained in that episode and the previews of Mutant X I happened to see when watching other shows. So basically:

This is a Emma based fic: therefore she might be glorified a little.

Lexa will most likely appear. When she does it's with no idea about anything that has to do with her character, other than her and Adam used to know each other. So liberties will be taken when it comes to her, and her place within Mutant X.

Brennan, Shalimar & Jesse will appear like they were at the end of season 2.

I don't know the circumstances of Adam's return (or even if he is fully returned), but I will pretend that he is back at Mutant X.

Emma held secrets from her teammates. These can be concluded to be those she suggested in the episode "Reality Check." Most have to deal with her powers. WEEEEEE.... Fun fun fun.

Note: I doubt there will be any romance for Emma in this one. Sorry, but there may be upcoming angst between Emma and Brennan (angst of the nonromantic variety that is). Maybe implied Shalimar/Brennan.

All my writing is sans beta....

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The days were painfully long. In fact long was way too pleasant of a word to use for the way Emma watched the time roll by. Adam should have been here by now... He was alright. At least she was sure of that, even if she wasn't sure of the reason for his absence. She could still feel his presence in the world, and his temperament was in no way alarming. He was probably just busy.

Emma's eyes darted nervously around her small apartment. She needed a hobby. The emptiness of time felt like an enormous weight that slowly pressed down on her chest. She could almost feel her ribcage crushing. The more she paid attention to that weight, the more nervous she became, and the more nervous she became, the more the pressure would almost feel real. It was becoming unbearable.

Her long legs were crossed and rested on the desk in front of her. God, what she wouldn't give for a computer. And for her, that was saying a lot. She leaned back in to the chair and rested her head on the leather upholstery. What should she do? What could she do but wait? The loneliness was finally getting to her. She missed Sanctuary; everything about it. No matter what was going on, at least in Sanctuary, she always had something to keep her busy. At least the bad guys kept time passing by quickly.

She closed her eyes and focused on a single thought. Adam. She could feel him. He was in Sanctuary. He was alone in a room, but Emma could pinpoint exactly three other people spread out within the building. Three of them she knew. They were her old teammates, but the other one was unfamiliar. It was female. And of course, she was mutant. Predictable. Emma focused in on her for a few seconds, but withdrew when she knew she was getting to close. The knowledge of this woman's presence only added to the growing pressure that Emma could almost see crushing in on her ribcage. It hurt. She tried not to think of this woman as her replacement. They wouldn't do that. Would they?

But she was in Emma's old room.

The tears were building. Then the anger started to build also. Not because of this strange new woman, but because Emma knew she shouldn't allow herself to feel this way. It was past. Gone. She tried to remind herself that they thought she was dead. No, wait, they knew she was dead. She had already cried too many tears to still dwell on this situation. A wise man once said "A lie always remains the truth until someone tells you otherwise." Whomever he was, Emma knew he was right. And she had no reason to play with what her ex-teammates regarded as reality.

What was there to do? Emma opened her eyes slowly. Her clear blue irises were now distorted through the unshed tears. She blinked rapidly as she stared at the ceiling, hoping desperately to win her silent battle against tear shed. The tears had already won too many times. And Emma hated nothing more than the way she hated self pity. She was okay. Right?

She had only been awake for four hours today, but she was already exhausted. Her muscles ached and her brain cried out for silence. A silence that would never come. The cold ceramic walls of her bath no longer served as a wall between her and everybody else. Knowing everything about everybody no longer served any purpose. What good was it knowing someone, if they were to never know her.

After a quick snack of peanut butter on toast, she made her way back to what she now referred to as her bed, and laid down for yet another long rest.

"Adam..." she spoke almost silently. The need for rest far outweighing the need for psionic silence. The almost inaudible words traveled much farther than she ever meant them to.

He heard her. And soon, so would someone else.

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It's not much. Super short chapter... sorry, but there is much more in the works. Wanted to add the replacement part, most of all.

author's note: once again – liberties are taken with Lexa


	3. Dream Freefall A connection between two

"Hi," Emma said as she got shifted her weight in an attempt to get comfortable. She was resting on the same rock that had bared her weight so many times before. This was her place to think. And resting here, her though processes had been so clear so many times before, so why was it not so, now? It was the headstone. A simple indentation upon a rock that had been there for hundred's of centuries, why was a simple chip and a few scrapes so important? Because it was her name. It, Was, Her. She tried not to pay much attention to monument to her right. They had placed it here on purpose. They had known that this was _her_ place.

Adam's name was there too. They had believed she was dead so easily. They hadn't questioned. They had received him so easily. Adam was back though, and his name was still there, and they had accepted him, so why hadn't they at least thought about her? He was "dead," yet they trusted onto him? No one questioned her. She would have known if they had.

"I know you..." It was a simple statement, but to both of them it was meant more like a question than anything else. She should have been startled by the girl's sudden appearance. But Emma had been expecting her all along. After all, it had been Emma that had invited her to this place.

"I hope you would." She paused for dramatic effect. God, Emma always loved dramatic effect. "But I'm no longer naïve enough to get my hopes up."

The raven haired girl didn't reply. Emma enjoyed the girl's silence. It gave her power.

"You have my life." Emma stated. She could feel the girls nervousness. She didn't even have to look back to see that the girl couldn't even look at her. Lexa's eyes instead rested on the horizon, closely studying the sea in front of her.

"Emma?" Lexa asked, even though she already knew the answer.

It was Emma's turn to say nothing.

"They loved you, you know?"

"Of course." She said more to comfort the girl than herself.

"I never knew you?"

"So?"

"Then why are you here?"

"Hmmm?"

"If this is my dream? And you're dead? Than how are you here?" Lexa asked while turning her eyes to rest on the girls back. Lexa didn't have to be psionic to know why the girl wasn't looking at her.

"You're here because of me." Emma said, glancing over her shoulder at the now shy and humbled girl.

"How?"

Emma didn't reply.

"Are you dead?" Lexa asked quickly. She didn't necessarily know where the question was coming from, but it was obvious that with her limited knowledge of the girl known as Emma she didn't know enough to bring this apparition to life. Whether this was real or unreal, she was damn sure she couldn't accredit it to her limited imagination.

"No." Emma didn't know why she was telling this stranger the truth. Every inch of her body was telling her not to trust this woman, but she couldn't help it. They knew her. And they trusted her. So why shouldn't she? Dumb, Emma, Dumb. But the statement was already gone. And now the "enemy" was on to the truth.

But why should she call this girl the "enemy." There was absolutely no trace of animosity coming from this girl. True, Emma tried to hide her slight distaste of the girl from playing across her face as she would glace behind her, but the girl had no inhibitions about her. Emma smiled to herself as she realized exactly how soon that was going to change.

"Where are we?" Lexa risked voicing a little louder. "Is this real?"

"We?" Emma asked back, never quite expecting an answer. "Oh, girlie, we are definitely not here. Not at this moment at least." Emma tried to hold back the smile. It wasn't a smile of happiness, or the smile of awkwardness that Emma seemed to have a patent on. It was a smile to hide the anger that coiled like a snake inside the confinement of her ribs. This time the pressure was coming from inside. "I'm somewhere. And well, you? You're in my bed. Still." Emma let the last syllable drop like a stone.

Lexa could hear the added pressure that the girl had placed on every word that she so carefully chose. But this was unmarked territory. The blonde girl was upset with her confusion and her total lack of clarity on the subject, but she didn't know anything. More importantly she didn't even know how to go about achieving the knowledge that she so apparently needed. Everything she had heard about Emma Delauro said that the girl was sweet and understanding. Everyone _loved _Emma Delauro. And it was this fact that helped Lexa believe that she could risk venturing another question.

"Are you real?" She asked. And she immediately wished that she hadn't.

Within seconds a thick layer of dense fog seemed to fall on the conversation. The view in front of her was as clear as day, but Lexa suddenly found it hard to draw breath. Her mind raced through possible scenarios. Would someone be a fixating them with a drug? Some sort of gas? What in the world could have this control over her? And what did they want?

Emma rolled off of the rock, and gracefully stretched to her full height. She suddenly realized that the girl wasn't as short as she originally though she was. This could impair the intimidation just a bit. But Emma knew even though she had always maintained the "girl-next-door" image that she could hold her own when it came to standing tall and fluffing one's tail feathers. And the girl did back down.

"You bet your ass I'm real, honey." Emma stretched even more as she reached the location of the girl. She must of grew an inch, well she controlled the dream, so at least she made sure it seemed like she did. She now felt the girls anxiety, and she felt relieved that she came out the victor.

Lexa ventured another question, this time with a chocolate coating with little sprinkles places strategically on top. "I mean," she tried to keep her voice from shaking, "you're alive?" she choked out.

"Yes." Emma answered as her eyebrow twitched for emphasis.

Lexa now felt a slow decrease of pressure upon her chest. "So, where are you? Like, right now?"

"Me?" Emma chucked, as she let the sides of her lips curve up for the first real time in weeks. She thought for a second. But the answer was simple. "I'm bathing."

Emma was mystified about how easy the rest of the story flew from her lips. The girl had sat down next to her and seemed interested in the rest of her story. Adam had always listened to her. But no one had ever seemed as truly interested as this new girl. Whoever she was? This Lexa Pierce?


	4. Morning Realization & Confrontation

Review.... Pretty please.... Don't make me beg...

She hadn't rested well, to say the least. Lexa rolled over and glanced glumly at the alarm clock beside her bed. 10 hours. She had been asleep for ten hours. No way in hell.... If you would have asked her before her all too painful glance at the alarm clock radio she would have guessed that it had been only 10 minutes. Staring at the blinking red dashes, she suddenly realized to exactly whom the alarm had belonged to before it had fallen into her possession. That realization was becoming just as painful as the one about her understated lack of rest.

With a quiet groan, all the memories of her journey that she took, without choice, during the night came flooding back to her. What the hell? For some unknown reason, she had no questions. She understood everything except the predicament it left her in. Her entire world had changed due to a fifteen minute conversation with a girl she didn't know. But the world as it stood right now, made more sense than any world that she had convinced herself was her own. She had awakened a much more informed person. Lexa knew that everything that happened in her deep slumber still applied to the land of the living... well... the land of the conscious at least. Emma Delauro was very much alive. And even more shocking than that was that Adam had known all along. And if Lexa had any questions about her realization, it directly related to Adam's silence.

Breakfast had come and gone just as fast as Lexas "sleep" the night before. She hadn't said a word the entire time. Her three teammates had chatted on about anything and everything, and Lexa didn't hear a word they'd said. They'd noticed her unrelenting silence, but all three had silently agreed to not interfere with her focused personal concentration bubble. The chalked it up to being just another of Lexa's moody spells.

The thunder silently rolled off in the distance. What a weird weather pattern. Emma leaned back in her desk chair and stared out the window of her second floor apartment. She wouldn't have known it was storming outside if it hadn't been for the random flashes that took place in the corner of her covered windows. She couldn't hear the thunder. And at first she even managed to chalk the flashes up to just being part of her very over active and over stimulated imagination. She realized that there had been thunder but she had just assumed it was the bass thudding through the floor below. It was another crowded Friday night for the bar. At least _they _were going to stay afloat.

Emma loved storms. She believed them to be the most powerful force on earth. Nothing could humble a human being like any kind of serious weather phenomenon. A simple storm could make someone feel like an ant lost in the middle of a cement jungle. She silently wished for the thunderstorms of her youth to return. Even during the most intense rain shower, she always managed to feel like she was part of something greater. Now she just felt like she was alone. She could feel in her heart how unnoticed she had gone recently. It was never easy to play the invisible man. She had prided herself on being the one person who was aware of the storm. Wherever it was, she was conscious of it's existence. But not this one. She didn't like the idea that such a storm had gone unnoticed for such a long time. Her awareness was slipping. It was pouring less than a foot to her left, and she had barely even noticed.

Too much data passed through her brain. Every once in a while she would jerk awake and feel her body inhaling quickly and struggling for breath soon after. The first few times she thought nothing of it. It had felt like a heart attack, but it was okay if she died. She had accepted that future. So the idea of having a heart attack almost seemed like a good thing, it could actually be calming. Her heart stopping seemed like a simple death. Many people died this way. Normal people. Granted that none of them where only twenty four years old, but it was an end that she had accepted, mostly because it wasn't directly related to her brain. Emma saw that as good news. It was her brain that had both run and ruled her life, at least it wouldn't be what ended it.

It only took three days of supposed "heart attacks" before Emma figured out exactly what was the cause of her recent brushes with the underworld. And it wasn't her heart like she had hoped. She had come to associate these "heart attacks" with a shortness of breath. And soon she realized that it wasn't a heart attack at all. The poetry began to sing, and the definition of irony took on a whole new meaning. It wasn't her heart after all, it wasn't even a part of her physical being, it _was_ inside her brain. The simplest of motor functions.

She was forgetting to breathe.

Lexa felt his eyes on her. She had to restrain herself from laughing out loud. She kept her eyes fixed on Shalimar, Brennan and Jesse practiced their martial arts on the first floor of the dojo in front of her. To her right, she could sense Adam's eyes on her. She shifted uncomfortably, but his gazed never severed. Ohhhh... this was too much, even for her.

She decided to test his resolve.

She laughed out loud, and his look changed, she could sense that. She never turned and met his eyes. But she knew... that he knew... that she was reacting to him. "Well... Obi Kenobi... are even going to go to her?"

"Who?" he asked, baiting her, confused both of her direction of question and her recent actions.

"Ewwwww..." she said, returning his bait as it were. "I am not one for you to be fuckin' with right now Adam."

"I don't know what you want me to say, Lexa."

"I want to use your limitless knowledge and wisdom to tell me exactly why you sit here in the lap of luxury, as it were, while she sits alone somewhere watching her moments blink away," she finished with a hand gesture to illustrate her point.

A moment of silent realization passed.

"It was her choice." With that one statement Adam gave credit to the dream that she had so believed was true.

The dojo was nearly silent for the next few minutes as both of them stopped to gather their thoughts. The only sounds were their teammates battling it out, oblivious to the real battle that was forged just a few feet away.

It was Adam who finally broke the silence.

"Don't you think I want to be there? Don't you think that I realize how much it would mean for them to know the truth and to be at her side during these last moments?" he said while gesturing to the three play fighting on the floor in front of them. "I....  
he paused, and Lexa realized that he was choking back tears, "tried, but there is no way to force her hand in anything. Not anymore."

"Okay then..." she stated turning to acknowledge the tears flow silently down his face. "if that were true? Then why do I know now?" she asked.

Adam didn't reply. He didn't move.

"Actions speak louder than words, Adam. She came to me, and told me everything. And so now... I tell them."

Adam didn't protest as Lexa stood up, walked down the steps and approached the group, she mumbles something that he couldn't make out, and soon their battles halted and he could see them listening intently. He watched silently. For the first time ever, he had nothing to say.

Emma could stop her if she wanted too. So she must want this. He nodded more to himself than anyone. A few seconds later, he turned his back on the dojo and walked quickly out of the room.


	5. Unwanted Salvation?

A/N: Please Review!!!! It's the only reason I'm continuing. LLS was my muse to start with, but with such a lack of her work out there right now, it's all reviews that keep me going. I was completely uninspired when I started this chapter, but halfway through the fun-ness started to return. I want to do more soon. Reviews help more than you can imagine. Thanks

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Lexa couldn't bring herself to enter the small apartment any farther. Her natural fear of small spaces seemed to meld with the insurmountable amounts of tension that seemed to be radiating from her teammates, and this was enough to make her want to either run for her life or become a sobbing pile of nerves. She just hadn't decided which one yet.

The curtains were shut. The only light that eliminated the room escaped through the thin stitching of the blue material that hung from the handmade wire contraption that served as a curtain rod. The already eerily dark room now had a violet blue tint. Lexa couldn't help but think that this made the room resemble a tomb, rather than a place meant for a living breathing person. The only part of the body she could see was a silent, unmoving right hand. It was just simply hanging there, almost mockingly, over the edge of the tub. The fingers seemed to have an unnatural hue. Lexa figured most of it was due to the navy glow in the room, but there was also an obvious discoloring that couldn't be directly linked to the diffused sunlight. Maybe this was, after all… a tomb.

She couldn't see the face. Not from where she was standing, she felt lucky that the shower curtain had spared her that one detail. But the rigid ness of everyone else's position told her that they could. She couldn't quite make out Shalimars face, but the tremors that continued to rack the blonds small frame where an undeniable sign of the tears that streaked down from her eyes. No noise escaped the ferals throat, but even from the door, Lexa couldn't deny the despair that her teammates felt when faced with this girl. Yet Again. In some way she was envious of the amount of sadness and emotion that Emma seemed to inspire when it came to her teammates. More particularly Shalimar and Jesse.

Shalimar was on her knees. One hand was bearing her weight as she leaned forward and gripped the edge of the tub. The other covered her mouth as she struggled to continue breathing in a regular pattern. No one had moved in a really long time. Brennan stood both motionless and emotionless near the side of the room. Adam stood just a little in front of him and to the right. He hadn't said anything since the confrontation between him and his teammates before they had left sanctuary. Now he just seemed lost in thought, and creepily unmoved by the view in front of him. Jesse had long since turned away from the sight of his friend lying limp in a tub. His back was turned to the room and his hands rested on his hips. Every few seconds he would risk a glance back at the girl he recalled being so scared the first time he met her. He couldn't help replaying that moment in his head and compare it to the moment of her supposed "death." Even as what they all believed to be her last moments where upon her, her fear seemed to disappear. Emma hadn't seemed _really _scared in a long time. Not that day, and not for a great while before hand. She had seemed more calm. More in touch with herself. Now knowing the truth, everything pulled together tightly into a picture that they had all been oblivious to. And he hated his naivety to what was going on around him. Maybe if he had paid more attention he would have seen through Adams walls and been able to help find a way to save his friend.

Adam wasn't sure how long they had been by Emmas side, but every second seemed to stretch unbelievably long. Adam could feel himself getting older as he stood there. And with the slow trickle of time and his racing internal clock, he continued to rage in an inner battle he never wanted to fight in the first place.

Adam had always thought of his team as the children he never got the chance to have. Emma, in particular, had served as a dream daughter. She was already full grown when he first met her, but something within her allowed him to believe that she was much younger than she was. She had an innocence and sweetness that wasn't readily available in most women her age. Shalimar was far past that stage when she entered into his life. He loved her just as much as Emma, but he felt that he got a chance to see more of Emma's soul than he ever got to see of Shalimar's. Now looking at Emma, whose skin color was eerily close to the tint of the white porcelain basin that she laid motionless in… he wanted to cry. Not because he thought she was dead. He was basically sure she wasn't. But standing there… he found himself wishing that she was.

And that was what tore him in two. He wanted nothing more in this world than he wanted to save Emma's life. He even felt like it was his job. His responsibility. But during the entire trip it took to get there, he found himself hoping beyond hope that, for his teammate's sake, Emma had passed on. He loved her more than he could ever express, and it killed him to admit it. But. He knew. In the end, that if she were gone, his team would benefit. They wouldn't be faced with the pain all over again. The pain of watching her die. Again.

All this waiting was getting to him. He prayed silently, beyond hope, for Emma's peace, but he was already walking a thin line when it came to the four people under his command. He didn't want to assume anything. Much less that a former teammate had passed on. He needed _desperately_ to know if her struggle was over. Maybe for his own peace. He didn't want to push Shalimar, but he wasn't sure his heart could take the waiting and silence for another second.

Before Adam got the chance to say or do anything, Shalimar finally moved. She reached out with an ever hesitant right hand. Just inches before her fingers touched the pale skin of the girl in front of her, she stopped. Even Lexa, who was a good twenty feet away could see Shalimar's hand shaking as she tried to bring herself to make contact with her once trusted friend. Shalimar closed her eyes. A few more tears leaked out as she tried to steady her hand and force herself past the fear that held her back. She couldn't believe it was Emma. Emma was right there. Emma was inches away. Or was she. What if she reached out and her fingers never did find contact? She had many dreams where she felt like Emma was present. But she never was. What if she reached out…. And her hand just kept going? How could she deal with this loss? Yet again? Emma?

With a small sob, she forced her hand forwards. And came in contact with. Skin. Auhumh. Shalimars body jolted with a sob as she realized that this was no dream. She opened her eyes and watched as her fingers stroked Emma's cheek. It was still warm.

"Oh, God," she cried. She need not force her hand this time.

Shalimar nearly leaped forward as she reached for Emma's neck and searched for the point she knew might hold their salvations. Her next few breaths where quick and exaggerated and she felt for the pulse that she preyed for.

"Please…"

"Emma?" Shalimar didn't seem notice the elevated octave that her voice took on without her knowledge. But, everyone else did.

Jesse was the first to react.

Shalimar had quickly moved her right arm so it cradled Emma's right shoulder and then wrapped it around her body. "Get her out of the tub!" "Please get her out!"

Shalimar already had Emma's torso out of the basin by the time Jesse was at her side to help with the weight. Shalimar had reacted almost if she could remove Emma from the tub, she could remove her from the current situation. Almost as if she where drowning. She had no idea how close she was to knowing the truth.

Adam closed his eyes as he felt both Jesse and Shalimar rush past him. Jesse was carrying a lifeless Emma towards the helix as Shalimar sprinted ahead to get the plane ready. Lexa turned and walked after them. Then Brennan.

The last out of the apartment, Adam turned and glanced inside. He knew they were going to need explanations. Those he could give. It was the hope that was going to be a problem.


	6. Truth

Oh dear lord… sorry it took so long… I love writing this fic, but find inspiration hard. But, here is the basis of the story. It's my idea, and the storyline that I based this fic on. I hope you enjoy, and understand it. If you can't get it please email me. I can reword it. I read it and I understand it. But I'm not sure if you will. I guess this means I need a beta, so if you're willing, please email me also. So I'm officially looking for a beta,. The more minds the better. Right?

Enjoy: and hopefully understand

* * *

Shailmar concentrated on her breathing. It was the one thing she could hold on to. The one thing that proved beyond a doubt that she was no longer dreaming.

Do she dare move or unfocus her eyes?

Blinking had never before seemed such a dramatic step….

To blink.

That in itself was to risk reality. To give reality an escape. A way for her hopes to once again seem unattainable. For the dreams to recede back in to the darkness that they had originated.

Emma.

To blink… was a way to allow it all… to not be true.

* * *

Adam stood less than a foot away from the doorway. He could feel the cold metal of the workstation behind him, pressing harshly into his lower back. He carefully relaxed and took all the weight possible off his now weary feet. He had been awake for nearly forty-three hours now. Sleep had not only pervaded him. It now seemed like a close friend who had been kidnapped for reasons unknown.

He questioned his sanity. And if he questioned the one thing his consciousness could trust… how in the hell could he trust anything else?

All his worries. All his considerations. They were all visible in Shalimar's face.

He watched the young blonde closely… for both his own sake and Emma's. She hadn't really moved. Not since they returned from their trip to Manhattan. Brennan had left, and even Jesse had regretfully followed him after a long duration of silence had passed. Lexa had never felt quite as comfortable around Emma as the other team members. She had been the first to leave. Her presence in the lab hadn't lasted much past Shalimar's statement of "What the fuck is going on?" Adam had watched his newest team member leave, and as he glanced once more at her back as she retreated out of firing range, he realized that she probably knew as much as he did.

He had been able to delay. To pass Shalimar's question off until he had "run a few tests." In truth, he was surprised that she let that pass as an excuse. He knew, that she knew, that there was always at least a few tests to be run. An excuse was what it was. And he would try to make it last until he gathered the strength to face his mutants, and tell them the truth.

* * *

His eyes moved from the people lined up before him to quickly scan through the array of papers that were laid out in front him. He juxtaposed the two together. The items he was currently using to procrastinate the situation were the only items that could possibly make him more nervous that the overdue appointment at hand. How could he look them all in the eyes?

So… he picked one.

"Brennan?" Brennan looked up at Adam and then glanced at his team members who's attention he had suddenly and unintentionally earned.

"Hmmnn?"

"How would you describe Emma?" Suddenly, Brennan really, really didn't want this attention.

With a slight pause, and consideration, he answered, "I don't know. Tall. I guess." He let his last word trail up, to allow for interpretation of a question, if one were so inclined.

Adam recognized his resistance and reluctancy to play the quarterback in this game. "No, I mean how would you describe her mutancy?"

"Oh…" Brennan seemed relieved at such an easy out to such a complicated question. Adam had to suppress a laugh at Brennan's naivety.

"Telempathy. Emma's a Telempath." Finally a statement. Adam was momentarily pleased.

"How about you?" He glanced from Jesse, then to Shalimar, and then finally to Lexa, and was slightly surprised when she agreed with the other two and simply nodded along with Brennan's statement.

"Okay, now that's where this story begins."

* * *

"We've all heard these myths, that we only use a certain percentage of our brain when it comes to activity."

"Well in certain ways these myths are true and these myths are false." Adam glanced around at the confused quartet standing in front of him. He knew Shalimar's impatience was going to make her act before the though of saying something even occurred to her.

"What does this have to do with anything?" She finally asked.

"Hold on… I'm not wasting your time. Just please give me a chance to relate this to Emma."

Just the simple mention of the girl's name seemed to have a calming effect on the feral.

After a slight pause, he continued. "Now this myth is true, every second." He waited as he always did, to find a slight glimmer of understanding on his teams faces. He didn't find any. The only person he had ever found any such glimmer on, was the now unconscious girl lying on the slab.

After a few seconds, he finished his statement, "Right now, as we speak, as we stand here; I mean of this second, It is true. The percentage that you use is, of course, varied from person to person. Now… brain activity is used to facilitate motor functions and do such… unconscious things. As an example: you all are using brain cells to stand here, not fall over, and breathe at the same time. You are not aware of it, but you are doing it just the same" He paused and looked for questions. "You are also using brain cells to do conscious things such as actually assimilate what I am saying. I.E. you are focusing enough to hear and decipher what it is I am saying. These are both basic functions when it comes down to the assault that your senses are put through every day."

"Now here is what your brains might look like now." Adam walked over to the nearest wall and slipped what looked like a CAT scan sheet under the clips at the top of the board. With a quick flip of a switch the team watched as a sheet of velum showing the cross section of brain was eliminated before them. "As you can see, when it comes to all the grey matter shown in these scans, only a small section of the area is actually being used. In such a small time your're only using a small proportion of your minds. So the myth is true… given the measurement is taken within a small period of time. Of course many many more and different… and various… parts of your brain are used over the period of a day. Think of it like this: the more time given the more sections of the brain you will use. So in that way the myth is untrue.

With a pause, and a quick prayer, Adam continued.

"And now this is Emma."

As quick as he could, Adam added another scan next the one he had just placed.

If he had had the gumption to turn and actually watch the faces of his team when they saw Emma's cranial scan. He would have saw one overwhelmed with grief, one overwhelmed with awe, one who seemed pleased with themselves for knowing the truth all along, and one who seemed to be trying a little too hard to be unperturbed and unattached.

* * *

"Okay… I see the difference. What does it mean?" Lexa spoke up for the first time since they had all regathered to hear Adams long coming explanation.

All four mutants once again focused all attention on their mentor.

Adam made a quick glance at the evidence behind him and made a quick comparison. In truth there was no reason to even try to compare the two scans. The first showed a miniscule section of the brain being activated compared to the second. When it came to Emma's scan the unused area of her brain was miniscule compared to the section of the used brain of the normal human, or inactive mutant. In other words, about 10 percent of the brain was being used for the first scan, and about 95 percent is being used in the second scan.

"What this is saying… overall… is that Brennan is wrong."

Brennan quickly became uneasy again facing the gazes of his peers. And was just as quickly relieved when their gazed once again focused on Adam.

"Well, he's only proportionately wrong. Emma is a telempath." He paused and waited for everyone to catch up.

"But, it is not her first mutation."

"There is a theory. And this theory states that all mutancy is, is an ability to use more percentage of the brain the average person can at a given time." Adam glanced around and watched as Jesse seemed to pick up on what he was saying.

"K, what your saying is that if the average person uses only… say… 10 of their brain at a given time, that a mutant is someone who can, when willing, use…. Oh… say… 25 of their brain at the same given time. Right?"

"Yes, you're getting the basic concept… at least when their mutancy is activated."

"So, what mutancy is… is extra sections of the brain being used at the time?" Lexa asked.

"Well……. That's the theory. And it's the only way that I can come up with to explain what is happening to Emma." Adam explained.

"What does this have to do with her mutancy?" Shalimar asked, apparently missing a link in their conversation.

"That _is_ her mutancy." Adam stated. "If the average person uses 10 of their brain, you with your mutancy active would use…say… 20, now if your were to mutate again. Have a second mutation. You might use something like 30 to 35. It's all give and take, particularly when relating it to Emma."

Continuing… "Now… When it comes to Emma… Telempathy is not her mutation. The simple ability for her brain to allow for such extreme and severe expansion is." Adam glanced at his teammates who were all lost in the contemplation of his meaning.

"Her mutancy _is_ her brain. _PERIOD_…. Her brain allows for expansion. It allows for more grey matter to be used at any given time… and this allows for other powers to manifest. In truth all these powers have a given a cause and a reason to manifest, but Emma Delauro is simply a mutant who is given the ability to mutate into anything her mind can come up with."


	7. A Brief Opening

No.

Blue iris's blinked rapidly against the fluorescent lights.

No.

Please tell me….no.

She had said goodbye to this life long, long ago.

To say that the bright light hurt her eyes seemed like an understatement. For the first time in as long as she could remember, the bright light seemed more painful than the constant humming that always overpowered her senses. It hurt. It hurt like hell, but for the relief, even for a second. She was thankful.

"What's going on?" she could hardly recognized the voice as her own. It seemed foreign. Inhuman. The voice was different. The history behind it was gone. In a flash.… Everything that had ever mattered, mattered no more. That voice didn't belong to Emma Delauro.

Not that girl. Not the simple girl who was born some twenty three years ago. That girl… she had faded long ago…

"ADAM?"… Her voice sounded urgent and concerned. For what she didn't know, and she didn't quite comprehend. She tried to focus for a complete second, but once her brain even began circulate towards comprehension, she stopped. It hurt far too much to even begin to think about thinking, why waste your time trying to understand something that seemed to come naturally.

So… she worried.

It didn't hurt too much to blank out on the fact that her being here… it… just… seemed wrong.

"I'm not supposed to be here?" She knew it was the truth, that she didn't belong, her brain felt like it was swimming in a fish bowl that had suddenly been fogged when a couple cups of milk had been added. Everything was familiar, but she would be damned if she could distinguish up from down. But the statement still came out sounding like a question.

It was the truth, and yet she still trusted Adam to distinguish what she held as fact, and what she held as fantasy. He had always been her north star. Whom else was she to trust.

As always, it was him, and he was near by. She could sense it. "Adam?..." It sounded more like a plea than a question anymore.

There were five people within her immediate surroundings. She was sure. There was no uncertainty left in her mind. Two were close. The other three seemed to be keeping busy with whatever was at hand. One was easy. He was the man she had sought out so many times before, in countless times of uncertainty.

The other was…

Oh, god… No….

Her eyes clamped shut again, and she tried desperately to will herself back into unconsciousness. This wasn't happening. This wasn't happening. It couldn't be. They had taken care of this situation a long time ago.

It couldn't be her…. ?

* * *

Shalimar stood and strode towards the gurney. She reached the girl's side as she watched Emma's eyes clamp shut.

"Emma?..." She asked…., for the first time since they had brought back the body from Manhattan, the always quiet and stoic empath had reacted. Shalimar was no fool, she could gauge a bad reaction, and she knew that Emma was not glad to feel her presence.

She was conscious. Not a lot, but she was still awake at least.

Shalimar gently ran her fingertips down Emma's left cheek. The softness and warmth boggled her mind.

The stiffness in Emma's position was clearly visible. Her eyes where clamped shut. Her arms where rigid. The fear that seemed to be radiating off of the telempath seemed to both soothe and upset the feral.

Emma was scared. She was scared of her. Why would Emma be scared of her? But for her to be scared, meant that she had to be conscious of her presence. And that into itself, added a whole new level of reality to the situation.

Emma was really alive.

"Oh my god…. Emma." She closed her eyes and found herself reliving the time since that day in her father's building. She saw the explosions. They were all running. She heard Adam call Emma's name.

She closed her eyes and was quickly taken back to the moments that she had first realized that Emma was gone. She saw the body on the stretcher, and she saw the ring fall. Her best friend was gone. Her best friend was dead.

If that was a lie… how could she tell if this all was true?

Oh, god… she could be dreaming.

And then she felt it.

It was only the slightest touch. Something that could have been overlooked and written off as a small draft passing over the small hairs on her hand. But her feral senses registered it as so much more. It was a touch. She could almost dare to call it a caress.

But… none the less it was there.

Fingers closed around the side of her hand, and quickly intertwined between her already splayed fingers.

Reality was knocking perilously at the door. After a quick decision, Shalimar slowly opened her eyes and glanced down.

She was met with foggy blue iris's. Within a single second, she no longer had any doubt that the girl in front of her was Emma.

* * *

Emma Delauro forced a smile.

The muscles in her cheeks almost quaked with weakness. But she held fast and watched as tears slowly made their way down her team mates face. Both the joy and the grief radiating from Shalimar, helped make the current predicament ever present. But she continued to smile.

None the less.

* * *

Adam quietly shut the door behind him.

He had watched Emma stir and he had watched Shalimar nearly leap to her side.

He had always held fast that he had done the right thing. Their choices had always been based around those who would be more in harms way, than they would be. He had to believe that he had done the right thing. And he had managed to convince himself so.

But, watching Shalimar react to just a glimmer… now that had rocked him to his core. Both him and Emma had given up hope long ago, so to watch someone blindly jump at a reaction, seemed like watching a starved man who was already at heaven's gate, beg for food.

Adam turned down the hallway and quickly hasted towards his room. Down the corridor he saw both Jesse and Brennan headed his way, and he quickly realized that rest would take at least a few moments longer to come to him.

* * *

"I don't understand." Jesse said flatly, as he leaned up against the wall just below the stairs to the dojo. 

"We watched you both fall." Brennan finished his though for him. "Not only that… We saw Emma dead. We saw her body. We saw her ring."

"No… Don't you get it?" Adam stated. His patience was finally getting the better of him. "You saw what she made you see."

The blank faces on the two men told him that they still didn't understand the situation before them.

After a deep breath… Adam continued. "Yes, we fell. But… we were never even close to being in danger."

"But you fell?" Brennan stated again.

Adam glanced at the taller man and started over, yet again. "Yes, Brennan, we did fall, but Emma's power stopped us from being all squished on the sidewalk."

After quick glance, and eyebrow raise from the two other men, Adam added…

"Okay… so I need to sleep."

"Emma… She saw this as an out. One, we had been looking for, for quite some time. She, for lack of a better word…, caught us on our way down… and she made _you_ see her dead." He continued… "But, she didn't make you see me as dead… only because she knew that I would once again have to return to you, as the leader of Mutant X."

"Why?.. Why her?... Why dead?" Jesse asked.

Adam glanced up at the young man.

"Because, she knew it would be easier for you to accept her murder, than her slow and painful demise."

"Now, come on… you're Adam… you have to know some way to be able to help her." Brennan added, like it was the answer to everything.

"Oh… I know an answer… and that answer is her."

After a brief silence from the two men, he continued. "Look at this as… well… kind of, sort of, the same thing that Brennan went through when his power mutated. The only thing that could help him keep it under control, was for him to force his brain to focus… and the only thing that could help him to do that was… a telempath. He's only alive because of Emma. And he only experienced about 1/18 of what she's going through every second."

Adam watched as the realization seemed to set into the two men before him.

"If this were happening to anyone else… she could help them. She would save them, the way she saved you, Brennan. She could literally help your brain to focus on what you would need to focus on. In other words… she could keep all distractions at bay. She could help you weed out anything that was unimportant."

"But, the question is now… How do we help her do that for herself? If you find out how... PLEASE LET ME KNOW… God only knows that I've been searching for a solution ever since Emma first came to stay with us."

"Why do you think she was reluctant to join Mutant X the first place."

"So… to state this in the most simple way possible… 'the victim is the perp.' And, for the life of me, I cannot figure out how to make her help herself."


End file.
